You are always so sweet like honey... I've wanted to write about you from the very first time we met but could'nt exactly put the words down like I wanted to. I always for some un known reason that I actually probably know, find myself running back to you every single time that now my stomach actually turns when I think about how much you mean to me. My friends all say that I never actually told you how much you mean to me but I know you know. We kinda work like that. The unknown and unheard things always come out without ever having to say them. One look from you and I'm instantly melting. I hate myself for it to. I loose myself every time I'm with you but I love the feeling so much. I love not giving a single care in the world. I love feeling like you and I could take over the whole world if we really wanted to. I love how fast you drive and how you laugh at every single one of my jokes. I love the fact that you are the only person that knows me on a whole other level. I would say I love you but my pride won't let me.
I wish you hadn't left me for her. Crazy how sex controls the average teenage boy's brain. I would've gave you so much. My whole heart for christs sakes does that mean anything to you? I would've let every single guard down for you I would've said screw being scared of feeling vulnerable I would've loved you so hard. I know you didn't t leave me for any other reason because even the thought of whatever we had meaning nothing to you and causing you to feel another connection would tear the shreds of my heart I have left up. You always come back though that's the one thing that I'll always remember.. This time though, coming back to you would take a lot more than a facetime call. It might take everything in me to say no, but thankfully I've still got a little of the old me still there.. somewhere. I'll find her. "You were not wrong for leaving you were wrong for coming back and thinking you could have me when it was convenient and leave when it is not" -milk and honey
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February 2017
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